they lucky we was at chuuch.

now. i love children. just to get that out the way.
but i love them in small doses. do not come to me asking me to keep your kids for a day. i can keep your kids for 6 hours at most. any longer, you'll be coming home to a crime scene. unless you have good kids, who sleep. i dig sleeping kids,'cause that means i get to sleep too. don't think i won't, either. (thus are the benefits of being yea tall--i can curl up in a toddler bed and have room to stretch a little.)
but all weekend, except for saturday (and i might have then too, but saturday is oddly blurred in my mind...that benadryl got me so far gone, y'all...) i babysat. on friday deren and i sat for our parents' small group. i got the little kids, 3 and under, including the cutest baby in the world.
swear to god, if i had her right now, i'd make a run for the border. the only thing keeping me from it is remembering how much she likes to eat. child ain't a year and a half yet, and recognizes mcdonald's bags. that's some bad stuff. i can barely afford to eat my ownself, i definitely can't feed her.
but anyway. deren had the old, bad kids.
see, i can't stand a bad kid. especially if they not related to me. if you watching your cousins, you can pop them upside the head and remind them what's what. you can't do that wit other people's kids. 'cause that's my only hustle at the moment. i don't need rumors of deven attempting to kill children getting out.
so the small group was at my aunt's and uncle's house, and me and all the little kid's were in my youngest cousin's room. before we were in the movie room, but the big kids kicked us out. while we were in there though, one of the babies gave deren the filthiest look i've ever seen in life. he mean-mugged her like he was getting paid. from the side, no less! i was impressed and terrified all at the same time.
but i got 11 dollars out of that one. all good.
sunday, i had to teach in sunday school. oddly enough, i actually enjoy teaching. it makes me happy that i can encourage the little kids to love god.
but. sunday school means that the p.k.'s are in full effect.
i can stand a bad kid. for an hour or so.
i can take a screaming baby, 'cause i can generally soothe them--i think half the reason most babies like me, especially if they mamas breastfed them, is my mammary glands, real talk; the other half is 'cause i'm just so dang awesome.
but a p.k.? NOT NEVER.
these little kids were telling my other students that a) i was evil. b) they didn't implicitly call me a witch, but apparently i make potions in my spare time. and when one kid was like she goes to church though, they logically pointed out that there's no telling what i do during the week. i will give them props for intelligence. and c) that i got them in trouble some kinda way. GOOD. you deserve to be in trouble!
i congratulate myself on not attempting to strangle them. my fingers were twitching though.
in other news: my family's illness has finally caught up to me.
i had been doing so well...not staying on campus meant i avoided all the sickos. but my father teaches elementary; errthing they get, he gets 10x. and my pitiful malnourished little body got this 20x. rawr. i'm taking more benadryl when i get home. :D